#I HATE SO MUCH THAT THE ONLY PERSON HE EVER EXPRESSED THIS TO WAS HIMSELF #THE ONLY PERSON HE EVER TURNED THIS ANGER ON WAS HIMSELF #AND THAT IT WAS A SINGULAR MOMENT OF HIS SENSE OF SELF-WORTH #THAT DIDN’T LAST AT ALL BUT QUICKLY SETTLED BACK TO ZERO #AND NOBODY WHO KNOWS HIM WOULD EVER BELIEVE #THAT HE’D EVER SAID THESE THINGS ALOUD #ONLY SAYING THEM TO HIMSELF IN A DREAM #ISN’T CHANGING ANYTHING IS IT? #SO NOBODY EVER SAW THIS #THIS WAS THE DREAM SAM SHOULD HAVE SEEN #BOBBY TOO #BUT THIS REMAINS A THING OF DEAN ALONE #NO ONE HEARD HIM #JUST A DREAM #A NIGHTMARE #EXPRESSING THIS ANGER ALOUD WAS A NIGHTMARE TO HIM
#but maybe Castiel heard him #maybe Castiel was watching over him for longer than we ever thought #maybe Castiel knows...